Friday, 1 March 2013
Heaven Must Be Missing An Angel (I've Seen Wanted Posters Everywhere)
Sarahnator: Guys - how about Hansel and Gretel on Saturday? Famke Janssen!
Wetsoks: I'm good for that.
Me: Um, I may have to decline such a tempting offer. However, what about Cloud Atlas? Do we have any idea when we are all free to go see that?
Sarahnator: I can honestly say I have no idea when you are free to go see Cloud Atlas.
Me: God. What don't I pay you for? Seriously.
Sarahnator: If Wetsoks is okay with going out on both weekend days, then I would propose we see it Sunday afternoon.
Me: I may be (read: will be) hungover, but I can probably make that.
Sarahnator: Let's wait to see if Wetsoks confirms. I heard her and Liara might be breaking up so she might not want to go out much this weekend.
Me: BUT THEY WERE SO GOOD TOGETHER. Also, you know, she's a fictional character from Mass Effect, but whatever. Small details.
Wetsoks: Just because we have an argument doesn't mean we're breaking up. God. Stop being so dramatic!
Sarahnator: I like how you have both referrred to me as God today. From now on I demand to be worshipped! I will reward you in the next life. Maybe. Oh and come on - she is cheating on you. With me.
Me: *gets the popcorn* This is better than the telly I don't have. Anyway, you can be the God of Crocs. And I shall serve your nemesis, the Devil of Fashion. I SHALL NOT REPENT.
Sarahnator: I've never worn crocs in my life! I declare myself the God of Sweat Pants and Trainers. All who worship me and obey my rules shall be comfortable in this life and the next.
Wetsoks: I am the God of Busywork... which I am preoccupied with right now.
Sarahnator: Party pooper! The God of Sweat Pants and Trainers has spoken! There shall be no more hard work!
Me: From this point on, I may refer to changing when I get home as "putting on my church clothes".
Sarahnator: You need to get permission from the God of Sweat Pants and Trainers for that.
There was a brief pause.
Sarahnator: Permission granted. No one can say I am not a kind and generous god.
Me: Allow me to praise thee by doing as little as possible while remaining as comfortable as possible. If that's not devotion, I don't know what is.