The Taming Of The Stew

I cooked dinner for Wetsoks earlier this week - a nice wintery beef stew with lots of vegetables, which she eyed with some suspicion.

Wetsoks: (pointing) What's that?

Me: Leek.


Wetsoks: (pointing) And that?

Me: Carrot. Please don't tell me you can't identify most of the vegetables on sight

There was a short, awkward silence.

Me: Nevermind. Look, here's your plate. Now be careful, it's hot.


Wetsoks: Good god, it's like lava!

Me: Yes, it's hot. I just said that.


Wetsoks: (trying to eat) Volcano stew! I'm losing the first layer of skin from my mouth.

Me: (exasperated) Dude, just wait a minute til it cools.

Wetsoks: Oh, I mean to say - the Cublet and I chose some songs for the Sarahnator's list, for our road trip. She won't like them.

Me: I assume you've included lots of heavy metal, and Glee covers, since those are the things she hates most?

Wetsoks: Yup, I even put 'You're Having My Baby' on it.

Me: It's totally worth the rest of us suffering through that song just to see her face.

Wetsoks: I know.

Me: I love our friends.

I picked up my fork, and decided to test the stew. This, as it turns out, was a mistake.

Me: Ahh! Ahh! It burns!

Wetsoks: (calmly eating stew which is clearly still steaming) Yeah, it kind of does.

Me: I can't feel my tongue! It's burning my mouth!

Wetsoks: Chew quicker.

Me: That's your answer?! Chew quicker? So that it can scorch my insides instead of my mouth?

Wetsoks: Pretty much.

Me: I worry about you sometimes.

Wetsoks: ..... Stew's not bad, by the way.

Me: .....Yeah, I'm proud of it.