Party Like Lionel Richie

Wetsoks approached me yesterday at work, took my hand very carefully and spoke in a confidential voice.

Wetsoks: Now, I don't want you to get upset-

Me: Oh god, why?


Wetsoks: Something has happened-

Me: What?!


Wetsoks: Ronan Keating and his wife are splitting up.

There was a brief pause.

Me: Um. I thought they already had.


Wetsoks: (laughing hysterically) Don't you even care?

Me: No. I mean (grinning evilly) it's only words. And words were all he had to take her heart away.

Wetsoks: Ha! True dat.

Me: I guess maybe she didn't say it best when she said nothing at all.

Wetsoks: Indeed. And on a completely separate note, I'm thinking we should each choose 13 songs for the car journey to Loch Fyne on the Cublet's birthday.

Me: Why 13?

Wetsoks: Because (here please imagine someone yelling a lot of numbers very quickly, because this is essentially what happened) which makes sense.

Me: Okay Carol Vorderman, calm the fuck down. 13 songs. I bet you'll love my choices.


Wetsoks: On second thoughts, I want to be able to veto at least three.

Me: No veto.


Wetsoks: One veto.

Me: No veto. It's going to be 80s disco all the way. Hope you like partying like Lionel Richie. All. Night. Long. I might even wear my tshirt which says exactly that.

Wetsoks: VETO!

I exited the room.

Wetsoks: VETO! VETO? ....Dammit.