Wetsoks and I were in her room the other day, looking at something on the internet, when one of those erotic pop-up ads sprung up from nowhere.
Me: Wow, look at that!
Wetsoks: I'm good, thanks.
Me: No, seriously, look! It's called Hunter's Revenge!
Wetsoks: I don't think anyone is getting revenge. Someone might be 'getting' something else, if you know what I mean.
Me: I don't. I'm very innocent. Click it.
Wetsoks: No.
Me: Click it.
Wetsoks: I'm not going to click it.
Me: Click it!
Wetsoks: No! What if I die and the last thing someone sees on my browser history is Hunter's Revenge?
Me: It's worth it.
Wetsoks: No!
There was a brief silence.
Wetsoks: Okay, fine, I'll click it.
I hate to admit it (actually I don't because I have no shame, as anyone who has read this site already knows) but our clicking led to an adult toy website (where our minds were, for want of a better word, stretched) by all the products on offer. My expression was mirrored on Wetsoks face - much like if Hansel and Gretal had discovered the witch's gingerbread cottage hidden in a very realistically phallic forest.
Me: Do you suppose... Nevermind.
Wetsoks: What?
Me: This might be a stupid question, but could you wash those in machines?
Wetsoks: What kind of machines? Like a washing machine?
Me: (nostalgically) As a child, I broke our washing machine by putting Lego bricks in it.
Wetsoks: That's... a.totally similar situation. Yes, look, it says right here - dishwasher proof.
Me: Dishwasher proof?!
Wetsoks: Oh. Yes. That's kind of messed up.
There was another brief silence.
Me: Well, it's good to know that they're promoting proper hygiene, at least.
In summary, practise safe sex and remember, almost everything can be put in machines now.
Do try this at home.
But not with Lego.
ME: Have you seen my 'Fist of Adonis'?
ReplyDeleteOtternator:it's in the dishawasher brah...
HURL